We all carry pictures in our minds — silent little movies of how life should be.
How our partner should act.
What our friends should say.
How our business partner should step in, just at the right moment, and fix the problem without us asking.
And yet… most of the time, those movies are never shared. They stay locked inside our heads, behind a door that we assume others can magically see through.
The Dangerous Myth: “If They Loved Me, They’d Just Know”
It happens in love all the time.
You imagine your partner remembering your anniversary and whisking you away for a surprise dinner. You imagine the exact flowers, the words, the feeling of being seen.
But the day comes… and nothing happens. Not because they don’t care — but because they never saw the movie playing in your mind.
We do the same in business.
We expect our colleague to handle a task “the way we would.” We expect our co-founder to share our urgency, our exact priorities. And when they don’t, it feels like betrayal — even though we never explained what mattered to us in the first place.
Why We Keep Quiet
Sometimes, we stay silent because we’re afraid of being rejected.
Sometimes, because we’ve been told that asking ruins the romance or makes us “too much.”
And sometimes… it’s pride.
“If they really understood me, they’d just do it without me saying a word.”
But here’s the truth: expecting without speaking is like setting someone up to fail, then being hurt when they do.
Expectation vs. Agreement
Expectations are invisible.
Agreements are spoken.
When you turn an expectation into an agreement, you give the other person a fair chance to meet you there.
You say:
“It would mean a lot to me if we could celebrate our anniversary together. I’d love a dinner, just us.”
Or in business:
“I need you to handle the client call tomorrow because I’ll be tied up with the presentation. Is that okay?”
Suddenly, there’s clarity.
No guessing.
No hidden tests.
The Cost of Staying Silent
Every unmet expectation leaves a small wound. Over time, they pile up — tiny unspoken hurts that turn into distance, resentment, and disconnection.
And the worst part?
The other person often has no idea they’ve hurt you.
Replace Assumption with Curiosity
Your partner — in life or business — is not a mind reader. The most loving thing you can do is open the door to your inner world. Share the movie you’re playing in your mind. Invite them into it.
When you speak your wishes, you’re not ruining the magic — you’re giving it room to actually exist.
Because real connection is not built on silent tests.
It’s built on understanding. And understanding only comes when we dare to speak.
Stop expecting. Start expressing.
The world doesn’t need your silent hopes — it needs your spoken truth.
